Thursday, April 22, 2010


Yesterday, I had a moment where I reflected on the pure, innocent me that was some years ago. A me before I moved away from home. I was fresh out of high school with strong ambitions and a sweet spirit.
I loved to hug.
I loved to smile.
I was passionate about loving others on purpose.
I loved sunsets, lakes and rivers.
I was awe-struck of stars and the heavens.
I loved seeing people- looking in their eyes..seeing their heart and beauty and not their faults.
I admired love.

And above all...

I felt my walk with God was pure and untouchable.
I felt like Moses.

I hadn't had nearly an inch of impurity in me, though I wasn't perfect and had my inner issues. I just loved God and was closer than ever to Him. And, I delighted in loving others.

And then I met someone named Life. And he deceived, hurt, persecuted, abused, manipulated, seduced, over-powered and ran over me with a big red truck.

Later, the sweet, innocent, pure, loving, compassionate, sensitive, warm, inviting, hugable person went away.

But, thank God she didn't stay away. Because if it wasn't for God's grace by means of forgiving, delivering, restoring and mending...she'd still be here. That person was not your friend.

In a conversation I had with my husband yesterday, about the Kennisha he met while we dated verses the Kennisha he's married to today, his thoughts weren't at all what I expected. I was waiting for him to tell me how mean I am, impatient and just flat out Cruella-like. But, he didn't. He smiled and shared with me how he sees the beauty of change in me.

You see, he met me after I had been through an eminence amount of heartache and pain. I wasn't very loving. I wasn't very sweet. I was not even close to affectionate. I was stubborn. Strong-willed with a sharp tone. Yep, just flat out mean.

But he did something to help me, which is partly how I knew he was the one for me. He loved me anyway and was water for this very thirsty flower. God allowed him to be that for me.

And even after almost five years of marriage, he still focuses on my potential and not my failures. And, that blesses me. I believe that's a pure representation of Christ-likeness.

Aren't you glad that God sees beyond our faults and meets our needs? That he loves us still in spite of our will-full disobedience? And that he gently brushes us off and fixes our broken pieces?

That's just awesome to me.

And so, moving forward, my prayer is not to be the Kennisha I was yesterday, but to be the Kennisha that God wants me to be today. And that is my prayer for you.

Be encouraged.

Thank you for visiting The Ready Writer. I pray this devotional has blessed you today. Have a blessed week in our Lord Jesus Christ!

Kennisha Hill
Author & Speaker|

Please post your comments here.


elaine @ peace for the journey said...

Not a bad contemplation, sister. I think we could all benefit from a look back to who we were then, who we are now. Hopefully, there is a marked difference in the way we live and how we act. I am not entirely the same person I was, even five years ago. Same flesh... better faith. As the flesh begins to fade with each passing day, how I pray that my inward faith is allowed to take the stage more and more so that God's light and life is revealed in me.

Thanks for stopping by this week. I pray all is well with your soul and that you are finding complete fulfillment in your relationship with Jesus. Keep to it, friend.


Wendy said...

I love this post. I'm sure it will touch many people deeply, as it did me. When life has hurt us, it's so easy to climb inside our little house called "Me" and go around to every window and reach out and one by one, pull all the shutters tightly closed. We think we're safe now. We become closed, hardened, bitter. We think we're protecting ourselves, but we're the ones we've hurt the most. Forgiveness of others, and opening up to Jesus for healing are essential.
I'm so glad God has taught you these wonderful lessons, and the lovely, warm Kennisha is writing.
Faith's Firm Foundation